Blogger Constipation

In response to some e-mails and comments, I am hanging out here to explain myself (or lack thereof). Paraphrasing from Seinfeld, Kristen, "I will not submit to forcible [posting]!" And yet, here I am. Because some of you actually seem to get all horny for the blog. Geez, it's nice to be missed. But I'm posting for me, not you. GOT IT?! Umm , that's sarcasm. If you're not used to that, you must have ended up here in error. But keep reading because I've been told I say some pretty funny shit from time to time...

For those of you who know me, you are aware that sometimes I drop off the face of the earth for a few days. Then I suddenly appear in all my sahm glory with all too much to say. Therein lies my current dilemma. I am not suffering from a lack of topics upon which to bore you with my ramblings, but rather I have a plethora from which I cannot choose.

I am enduring a MAJOR case of blogger constipation and as soon as you all can help me out, I'm sure posting diarrhea will soon follow. If I don't get some assistance here soon, I'm afraid my creative system will be impacted. And that would completely suck. It's gross, but it's a great analogy. It's like I'm sitting here with a magazine and my drawers around my ankles thinking, "Will you just come out already?!" So discuss in the comments, if you will, the topics you would most like to see shortly:

My wedding story (I'm light years behind you more industrious bloggers on this)
Little Diva's birth story (see parenthesis above)
Salvation Army stress disorder
The coffee cup quandary
Little Diva learns the art of "working a room"
HDTV and its effects on people I envy
Top 10 things that annoy the shit out of me
SAHMBO (stay-at-home-mom burn out)
The strip tease class
ENFP - Yeah, I'm an idealist
Stuff I need to finish before I die
Annoying tidbits about Hubs

That's just a start. Pick some and help me out, dammit!